leftunspoken's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A hideously long survey I had an earlier entry with a point if you're interested. Boss man is on vacation for two weeks which means I could: A)Be responsible and manage things efficiently in his absence. B)Use the rare uniterrupted time to reorganize my office. C) Take possibly the longest survey I've ever seen, designed by my buddy Saint Debauchery.Guess which option I'm choosing? Who are you and what are you doing here? I'm a million people and I'm trying to entertain myself in my office to keep from just walking out the door and going for a drive through the mountains. 1)What is your favorite animal: Horse a)Three reasons why this is your favorite animal: -Beauty 2)What is your SECOND favorite animal: Tiger a)Three reasons why this is your SECOND favorite animal: -That purr noise they makes gives me shivers. 3)If you HAD to watch two animals fuck or you just enjoy watching animals fuck which animals would you prefer to watch: Lions 4)Would you fuck that animal yourself: Not in real life. But I did have a dream once about getting fucked by a lion. 5)So it's ok to watch them, just not fuck them: I'd rather not watch them either. Without changing your above answers for 3, 4, and 5: 6)Do you consider humans to be an animal: Oops. Yeah, even had a journal entry about that. 7)You are walking down a road, and you happen upon a huge wall that extends to eternity in both direction - there are no doors, it's about 1000 feet high...hell there's no way around it, up it, down it, or through it. What do you do: Shout "Shazam" at the top of my lungs. You never know what could happen. 8)While stopping and trying to figure out how to get past this wall, did you masturbate: That's no fun without someone watching. 9)You are stranded on a desert island...no, scratch that - you are stranded on a tropical paradise (i'm so sick of the desert island - apparently, the government wants you to believe that there is nothing but desert islands out there - and it's just not true!) ok, so you're on this TROPICAL PARADISE - you have all the food you could ever want and more than enough to drink as well as good shelter. PICK (3) things you would take with you to this island oasis: -music 10)If you had a song to be your themesong, what would it be: "I Shall Believe" Sheryll Crow a)Why this song: It just sounds like me. b)Does it have anything to do with who sings it? No. I don't even really like her, it's just one really good song. 11)What Cartoon character do you best relate to: Rogue from Xmen. a)Three reasons why: -I always ruin the things I touch. 12)Which Disney CARTOON Character would you have sex with: The Big Bad Wolf a)Would it be dirty sex: Of course. b)Would you respect them in the morning: Certainly. c)So what's stopping you from humping that characters leg next time you visit DisneyLand: Fear of rejection. d)Would it be bother you if while humping that characters leg, the person inside the costume was the same gender? No. 13)Apple, Peach, or Plum: Plum 14)Tomato, cucumber, or Okra: Cucumber 15)4, 6, or 8? six 16)Which would you prefer: a)choking on a large piece of glass, or b) eating and digesting small pieces of glass in your food over a one year period? b 16)For the sum of $500,000 would you chop off your left pinky (without the chance of using the money to re-attach) with a meat cleaver: no a)do you consider that desecrating the temple of God? no b)would you do it for $100,000? no c)what would you do with the money? If i'd taken the money. I'd pay off bills, invest, have a little fun, and help people. 17)Taking into account, your answer for number 16 - what's stopping you from being a prostitute (male or female)? (let's face it, you're willing to physically chop off a piece of your body with no chance of getting it back - but you have morals about accepting money for sex?) I said no to the pinky chopping. But prostitution is a whole other matter. ;) 18)Have you ever accepted money for sex? Nope. a)Was it from one of the Disney characters???? smart ass. 19)You have no choice: you have to get buttfucked by a 10-inch steel dildo. Of these people, who would you want to administer the abuse? c. I have the hugest crush on him. Plus he seems like he'd be gentle. 20)Do you believe that we learn from pain? Always. 21)With 20 being said, would you volunteer to have 6 weeks of chemo for absolutely no reason, other than learning from that pain? No. 22)I wouldn't do it either. Thank Heavens. 23)If you had to catch a deadly disease/illness, which of the following would you choose? These are my options? What the fuck is wrong with you? I guess I'll take c. 24)What sexual position best describes you? Mmmmmm A. 25)Have you ever had an orgasm? No. a)describe it with only 5 words. Sad, huh? 29 and I've never had one. I think I still have issues from childhood. 26)Would you fuck the person who sent you this? (Wasn't really sent to me.) But, no I wouldn't fuck him. a)why: I think he might just be too much for me. *Said while placing back of hand to forehead and twirling the skirt on my Little Bo Peep outfit in the other hand.* 27)Have you fucked the person who sent this to you? Nope. a)why? What...and be another experiment? Thanks, but I'd rather just be friends. 28)What song would you fuck this person to? Something heavy metal. 29)What's with all the fucking?!?! You tell me. 30)It's fucking over! Did you learn anything? Yes. I will do almost anything to avoid work. Thanks Gem. Love ya, man. 10:55 a.m. - July 28, 2003 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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