leftunspoken's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Too many question marks Am I beautiful with my breasts in your hands? Am I lovely when I'm pressed against you? Do you marvel at the perfect curve of the bodies God made us? Do you compare our skin? Your pale mexican honey and my summertime apache brown? Do you find yourself breathless against me; forgetting oxygen in favor of drowning in the scent of my skin? Do you ache when I leave? Do you hate, even a little, going back to her and that life you don't want? You swallow it. I know you do. I know you too well. Believing that shaking your head settles the matter. Your heart has a different dogma. Stupid man. Think you can pretend forever? You'll die one day wondering why you didn't let go. And she'll have been gone for so long you won't even remember why you sacrificed the things you should have wanted. Am I beautiful when you look at her? You think I don't know when you're watching me, when you are memorizing me, when you are begging for scraps? You think patronizing me will erase your mistake? I pity you. Don't get me wrong - I pity me too. I don't think either of us got the life we wanted. But at least I admit that. 4:11 p.m. - June 30, 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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